Community The Top 6 Skills To Become A Better Leader Coach Ana SmithJune 07, 2022 Bigstock {"adCodes": [{"desktop": "\u003cdiv class=\u0027rblad-wit_content\u0027\u003e\u003c/div\u003e", "display": true, "mobile": "\u003cdiv class=\u0027rblad-wit_content\u0027\u003e\u003c/div\u003e", "new_amp": "\u003camp-ad width=336 height=280\n type=\"doubleclick\"\n data-slot=\"/22278042776,22664312254/wit/wit_content\"\n data-multi-size=\"300x250\"\u003e\n\u003c/amp-ad\u003e", "order": 0, "tablet": "\u003cdiv class=\u0027rblad-wit_content\u0027\u003e\u003c/div\u003e"}, {"desktop": "\u003cdiv class=\u0027rblad-wit_content\u0027\u003e\u003c/div\u003e", "display": true, "mobile": "\u003cdiv class=\u0027rblad-wit_content\u0027\u003e\u003c/div\u003e", "new_amp": "\u003camp-ad width=336 height=280\n type=\"doubleclick\"\n data-slot=\"/22278042776,22664312254/wit/wit_content\"\n data-multi-size=\"300x250\"\u003e\n\u003c/amp-ad\u003e", "order": 1, "tablet": "\u003cdiv class=\u0027rblad-wit_content\u0027\u003e\u003c/div\u003e"}, {"desktop": "\u003cdiv class=\u0027rblad-wit_content\u0027\u003e\u003c/div\u003e", "display": true, "mobile": "\u003cdiv class=\u0027rblad-wit_content\u0027\u003e\u003c/div\u003e", "new_amp": "\u003camp-ad width=336 height=280\n type=\"doubleclick\"\n data-slot=\"/22278042776,22664312254/wit/wit_content\"\n data-multi-size=\"300x250\"\u003e\n\u003c/amp-ad\u003e", "order": 2, "tablet": "\u003cdiv class=\u0027rblad-wit_content\u0027\u003e\u003c/div\u003e"}], "adsOrder": [2]}

If you are a leader who aims to become a human leader, who might feel that your personal mission in life encompasses enabling greatness in others; helping people figure out how they matter, how their teams matter; how they can work together unleashing their potential for the greater good; and making a positive difference, then these might come in handy as you continue to build your leadership skillset—for today and the future.

1. Establish Trust

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In any human relationship, trust is at the base; it is foundational. In this great period of change, uncertainty, and anxiety that we’ve all felt—how many of us feel exhausted and scared due to all of this? The teams and the people that you’re leading might be feeling deep levels of discomfort, maybe paralysis and even fear. There has never been a more crucial time to establish, deepen, or re-establish trust.

Establishing trust with the whole person, with everything that they are, is especially important. One way to do this is firstly by getting to know them. Take the time to know your people, really know them—what their aspirations, challenges, and career expectations are amongst other key areas.

Display your ability and expertise in supporting them, act with integrity, genuinely care for others, and be dependable. These will get you a long way in building or deepening trustworthiness.

2. Ask Powerful Questions

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If you want to learn what other people think, feel, expect, aspire to, etc., you must ask, and asking powerful questions can really provide you (and your coachee/employee/direct report) a lot of value and insight.

The definition of a powerful question is a question that will help the recipient “think, reflect, wonder, gain an insight” amongst other powerful things. Think of it this way: when you ask a powerful question, you are helping the recipient of that question gain perspective.

These types of questions usually start with what, how, when, or who. Depending on the topic at hand, they can really help you create a thought-provoking, high-impact conversation. Try it!

3. Listen Actively

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Have you ever wondered why we have two ears and one mouth? Some of us think it’s because there is an important proportion of time that the coachee/employee/direct report needs to have to express themselves, instead of us providing them with all the right answers.

Coaching is about “partnering with someone, in a thought-provoking and creative process that inspires them to maximize their personal and professional potential” (ICF).

One way to listen effectively or actively is to “listen to understand” not to respond. One of the shortcuts that we, as humans, create is what we understand as an ability to be ready to fire the response to someone as soon as they finish speaking. This is not active listening. This is listening to respond, which does not give you the necessary information or clarity. Does this sound familiar to you?

4. Establish Vision

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​There are many ways to achieve a desired state, yet when you use a “vision” technique for your coachee/subordinate/employee to envision the future (desired) state, you provide them with a unique opportunity to not only decide how to get to that goal, but you’re also promoting the opportunity for him/her to be creative, imaginative, and grow.

This is about focusing on the future, not on the past—yet taking advantage of lessons learned and capitalizing on both.

5. Set SMART Goals

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Focusing merely on setting up a strategy and expecting everyone to understand what they needed to do to achieve it is no longer the right approach. Productivity is no longer the result of repetitive, routine actions—so passee, especially in the light of a post-pandemic environment. We need everyone in our teams, in our organization to be able to bring their whole selves and unleash their full potential.

We’re so in a VUCA world and for our organizations to succeed, we need our people’s imaginations, we need them to bring their whole best selves to work. Whatever they might be feeling and living outside of work, which is now also part of work. Leaders, therefore, must show up as human beings.

Employees expect empathy, vulnerability, and authenticity from their leaders in addition to clarity. When coaching, approaching goal setting using the SMART (specific, measurable, attainable, realistic, and time-bound) approach, makes it easier for everyone involved.

6. Establish Accountability

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Currently, with so many challenges and uncertainty, it is not infrequent for employees to feel unclear on what the right priorities to pursue are. When you coach, making sure that there is clarity on who’s accountable for what and by when, becomes critical.

If accountability (and goals) are not proved in coaching conversations, they could simply become nice conversations. There is no growth, no actions, no path forward.

Avoid confusion and increase meaning and impact through insightful, thought-provoking coaching conversations. Good luck!

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{"customDimensions": {"1":"Executive Community, Ana Smith","2":"community","3":"leader coach, skills, leadership, coach, coaching, leader coach skills, ~rmsc:rebelmouse-image:29933507, ~rmsc:rebelmouse-image:29933509, ~rmsc:rebelmouse-image:29933531, ~rmsc:rebelmouse-image:29933512, ~rmsc:rebelmouse-image:29933518, ~rmsc:rebelmouse-image:29933521, ~rmsc:rebelmouse-image:29933529","4":"06/07/2022"}, "post": {"split_testing": {}, "providerId": 0, "sections": [0, 544324100, 544398565, 544398581, 473333499, 479660731, 544398559], "buckets": [], "authors": [21030904, 25006562]} } Get Some LeverageSign up for The Work It Daily NewsletterEnter emailSubscribeFollow window.googletag = window.googletag || {cmd: []}; googletag.cmd.push(function() { googletag.defineSlot('/22278042776,22664312254/wit/wit_multiplex', ['fluid'], 'wit_multiplex').addService(googletag.pubads()); googletag.enableServices(); googletag.display('wit_multiplex'); }); Popular The Waiting Game: Surviving Job Offer Anxiety Erik EpiscopoJenna ArcandJune 07, 2022 Bigstock {"adCodes": [{"desktop": "\u003cdiv class=\u0027rblad-wit_content\u0027\u003e\u003c/div\u003e", "display": true, "mobile": "\u003cdiv class=\u0027rblad-wit_content\u0027\u003e\u003c/div\u003e", "new_amp": "\u003camp-ad width=336 height=280\n type=\"doubleclick\"\n data-slot=\"/22278042776,22664312254/wit/wit_content\"\n data-multi-size=\"300x250\"\u003e\n\u003c/amp-ad\u003e", "order": 0, "tablet": "\u003cdiv class=\u0027rblad-wit_content\u0027\u003e\u003c/div\u003e"}, {"desktop": "\u003cdiv class=\u0027rblad-wit_content\u0027\u003e\u003c/div\u003e", "display": true, "mobile": "\u003cdiv class=\u0027rblad-wit_content\u0027\u003e\u003c/div\u003e", "new_amp": "\u003camp-ad width=336 height=280\n type=\"doubleclick\"\n data-slot=\"/22278042776,22664312254/wit/wit_content\"\n data-multi-size=\"300x250\"\u003e\n\u003c/amp-ad\u003e", "order": 1, "tablet": "\u003cdiv class=\u0027rblad-wit_content\u0027\u003e\u003c/div\u003e"}, {"desktop": "\u003cdiv class=\u0027rblad-wit_content\u0027\u003e\u003c/div\u003e", "display": true, "mobile": "\u003cdiv class=\u0027rblad-wit_content\u0027\u003e\u003c/div\u003e", "new_amp": "\u003camp-ad width=336 height=280\n type=\"doubleclick\"\n data-slot=\"/22278042776,22664312254/wit/wit_content\"\n data-multi-size=\"300x250\"\u003e\n\u003c/amp-ad\u003e", "order": 2, "tablet": "\u003cdiv class=\u0027rblad-wit_content\u0027\u003e\u003c/div\u003e"}], "adsOrder": [2]}

Have you ever felt like you totally rocked an interview? You had all your questions and answers prepared, the hiring manager really seemed impressed, and they even hinted at a call back. You wake up the next morning with a huge grin on your face expecting an email or a phone call, but you receive nothing. No worries, right? “They will probably get back to me tomorrow," you think to yourself.

However, tomorrow comes and goes, as does the next day and the day after that, all without a phone call or an email. Days turn into a week, and you begin to get a bit antsy. Hope starts to dwindle as the questions begin to mount.

• What's taking so long?
• Was my interview not as good as I thought?
• Did I say something wrong? Did I misread the cues?
• Was my writing sample terrible?
• Should I send another email?
• WHY HAVEN'T THEY CALLED ME BACK?

As time goes on, you are consumed by these questions and can think of nothing else. This is a dangerous time for any job seeker. This inner state of turmoil is often referred to as job offer anxiety.

What Is Job Offer Anxiety?

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Job offer anxiety is the anxiousness and stress one feels usually while waiting for an interview or a callback. This anxiousness is frequently accompanied by tense behavior and rumination. People who suffer from this are in a never-ending search to discover why they haven't received an interview/callback when everything seemed promising.

In a struggle to answer this question, job seekers start to second-guess their interview and writing skills as each day passes. They blame themselves for not getting the call and their confidence all but disappears. Job offer anxiety can even affect job seekers after they have received an offer.

For instance, a job seeker may receive a job offer that happens to be their second choice. The question of whether to accept the offer or wait for their first choice now arises. This may cause unnecessary panic in the applicant which can lead to a misguided decision. Even just waiting for a callback is extremely destructive to the job search. You end up losing focus and wasting valuable time that could be spent pursuing other job opportunities.

If you have ever suffered from job offer anxiety, have no fear. Here are some specific causes of job offer anxiety and ways to overcome them.

Cause #1 - Forgetting To Continue The Job Search

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The solution: Apply for other jobs.

This advice seems obvious, but many people become so focused on the callback that they forget about the end goal: getting a job.

What better way to distract yourself than to continue looking for other jobs? Continuing your job search allows you to take your mind off the callback and get back to using your time wisely. Sitting around and waiting for the perfect job to get back to you isn't productive and won't get you anywhere closer to realizing your goal.

And who knows? While you are being focused and productive, time will pass a lot more quickly and you might finally get that callback you were waiting for, and if not, at least you expanded your job opportunities.

Cause #2 - Restlessness And Insomnia

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The solution: Exercise.

All that stress and anxiety can inflict heavy damage to your body and overall health. Those at WebMD.com recommend people with high anxiety to "relieve tension with vigorous exercise or massage." The Anxiety and Depression Association of America has found that "regular participation in aerobic exercise has been shown to decrease overall levels of tension, elevate and stabilize mood, improve sleep, and improve self-esteem."

When it comes to reducing stress and anxiety, exercise should not be overlooked.

Cause #3 - Lack Of Perspective

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The solution: Realize that HR is on a different time frame than you.

There is no doubt that, when searching for a job, time seems to creep by at a snail's pace. Some like to believe that hiring managers sit at their desk with an evil smirk tapping their fingers together (think Mr. Burns from The Simpsons) purposefully making candidates wait in despair.

Yet, it's easy to forget that employers may have responsibilities other than hiring candidates. Hiring managers would love nothing more than to get through all the applicants in a timely manner. But like every job, things tend to pop up unexpectedly that require immediate attention. It's important to remember this, take a deep breath, and give the hiring manager the benefit of the doubt.

Cause #4 - Not Sure When To Follow Up

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The solution: Use proper follow-up etiquette.

It's important to remember that the interview doesn't end until you have sent a follow-up thank-you letter. Susan Adams of Forbes advises applicants to send a follow-up letter as soon as possible. If you wait too long, other prospective employees might beat you to it.

While sending a handwritten note is a nice thought, it takes much too long for the employer to receive it. So, email is always the best choice for sending your follow-up thank-you note. It's also a nice touch if you add a high point from the interview in your message.

However, even after the follow-up thank-you letter, applicants can still find themselves without a response. In this case, it is appropriate to follow up again.

In "4 Things You Need To Do After The Interview To Get The Job," Sudy Bharadwaj believes that periodically following up every few weeks is a great way to stay on the hiring manager's mind. He recommends that: "Instead of asking, 'Have you made a decision yet?' forward a recent article you've read that you believe he'll find interesting and helpful. Following up in this way demonstrates that you're a great network connection instead of a pesky wannabe employee."

Cause #5 - Lack Of Confidence In Your Resume

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The solution: Check if you made common resume mistakes and/or get your resume reviewed by trained coaches.

One last measure to reduce stress and anxiety during the job search is to make sure your resume is in tip-top shape. Knowing that your resume is up to par can be a great boost to your confidence.

An excellent way to get some tips on your resume is to pass it out to your friends and colleagues. They might be able to bring some fresh ideas to your resume and suggest edits to improve it.

We hope you found these tips for overcoming job offer anxiety to be helpful, no matter where you are in your career. And remember...only worry about the things you can control. You'll avoid a lot of stress and anxiety this way!

We know how difficult it is to overcome anxiety in your job search. If you're struggling to find a job, we're here for you.

We'd love it if you joined our FREE community. It’s a private, online platform where workers, just like you, are coming together to learn and grow into powerful Workplace Renegades.

It's time to find work that makes you feel happy, satisfied, and fulfilled. Join our FREE community today to finally become an empowered business-of-one!

This article was originally published at an earlier date.

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