4 Things You Should Never Say When Asking For A Raise

Blog 4 Things You Should Never Say When Asking For A Raise Amanda Green Jenna Arcand January 20, 2022 Woman asks for a raise {"adCodes": [{"desktop": "\u003cdiv class=\u0027rblad-wit_content\u0027\u003e\u003c/div\u003e ", "display": false, "mobile": "\u003cdiv class=\u0027rblad-wit_content\u0027\u003e\u003c/div\u003e ", "order": 0, "tablet": "\u003cdiv class=\u0027rblad-wit_content\u0027\u003e\u003c/div\u003e "}, {"desktop": "\u003cdiv class=\u0027rblad-wit_content\u0027\u003e\u003c/div\u003e ", "display": false, "mobile": "\u003cdiv class=\u0027rblad-wit_content\u0027\u003e\u003c/div\u003e ", "order": 1, "tablet": "\u003cdiv class=\u0027rblad-wit_content\u0027\u003e\u003c/div\u003e "}, {"desktop": "\u003cdiv class=\u0027rblad-wit_content\u0027\u003e\u003c/div\u003e ", "display": false, "mobile": "\u003cdiv class=\u0027rblad-wit_content\u0027\u003e\u003c/div\u003e ", "order": 2, "tablet": "\u003cdiv class=\u0027rblad-wit_content\u0027\u003e\u003c/div\u003e "}, {"desktop": "\u003cdiv class=\u0027rblad-wit_content\u0027\u003e\u003c/div\u003e", "display": false, "mobile": "\u003cdiv class=\u0027rblad-wit_content\u0027\u003e\u003c/div\u003e", "order": 3, "tablet": "\u003cdiv class=\u0027rblad-wit_content\u0027\u003e\u003c/div\u003e"}], "adsOrder": [2]}

Maybe you like your job, but you’re just not where you want to be financially. What do you do? Apply for a position with a different company? Or approach your boss and ask for a salary increase?

The ability to negotiate a salary increase can place you in a better financial position: extra money can help you qualify for mortgage loans or refinancing, or if you’re trying to build a rainy day fund, a raise can jump-start these efforts. However, it’s important to research and know your value before approaching your boss.

In other words, you can only approach the conversation with a fair number in mind—based on the average salary for professionals in your industry with your experience and skill set. Of course, it isn’t enough to only research your value. You need to know the best ways to approach your boss.

Here are four things you should never say when asking for a raise:

1. Don’t Threaten To Quit

Some employees think they can get the upper hand by threatening to quit their job. However, this isn’t recommended, even if you’re prepared to follow through with the threat. Remember, the goal is to get on your manager’s good side, not tick them off. If you approach the meeting with an abrupt or aggressive attitude, your boss may not respond favorably—they may actually call your bluff!

A better approach is to explain how much you enjoy your work. Let your boss know that you're interested in growing with the company. Next, state your argument for a salary increase. Be professional and keep your negotiations brief.

2. Don’t Mention A Co-Worker’s Salary Man asks for a raise

If you learn that a co-worker in a similar position earns more than you, don’t mention this when speaking with your boss. There may be valid reasons why your co-worker earns more. Maybe they have an advanced degree, or maybe they took additional courses to improve their skill set. Then again, maybe they have more experience than you. Don’t immediately assume that your employer is giving you the short end of the stick.

Rather than bring up a co-worker's salary, you could say:

"I've been researching the going rate for this position, and the average salary for workers with my education and experience is _____. I feel that I've been doing a great job and would like to discuss increasing my salary."

3. Don't Choose The Wrong Time Woman asks her boss for a raise

Don’t ask your boss for a raise out of the blue, and you certainly shouldn’t ask during a meeting on an unrelated topic. Once you’ve completed your research, schedule an appointment to meet with your boss privately. Additionally, prepare for this meeting by practicing responses. In all likelihood, your boss will question why you want a salary increase. The way you answer this question can determine the outcome.

Prior to this meeting, compile a list of all your accomplishments during the last 12 months. When your boss questions your reasons, be ready to run down this list and mention any other selling points. For example, you can mention any classes you've recently taken, and if it's been years since your last raise, bring this to your manager's attention.

4. Don’t Whine About Your Personal Problems Remote worker asks her boss for a raise

Do you have debt? Do you need to complete repairs around your house? Was your spouse laid off? These are all valid reasons to negotiate a salary increase. Understand, however, that your personal problems are not your manager’s problems. They no doubt will empathize or sympathize with your situation, but you shouldn’t expect them to automatically fix your problems by increasing your salary. Not that you shouldn’t ask for a higher salary, but keep the focus on your performance.

You could say:

"In the past ___ months I've taken on several new responsibilities (list them), and I know that you were satisfied with many of my suggestions and changes."

Getting paid your worth can improve job satisfaction. And if you’re already completing assignments outside your job description, why not take a chance and approach your boss? They just might comply with your request. Just remember to avoid making these four mistakes when asking for the raise you deserve!


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This article was originally published at an earlier date.

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Didn’t get the job? Rejection isn’t easy, but it’s important to leverage the progress you’ve already made with this company. In fact, this is a great opportunity for you to build a professional relationship with the hiring manager and keep things moving forward in the event another opportunity arises.

You want this person to be your advocate in the event another role opens up. Even though you didn’t get the job, you should take steps to keep moving forward. You want to use this opportunity to reinforce that you’re still interested in working for the company and that you’re willing to work toward becoming a better fit.

Here are some things you need to do if you didn't get the job:

1. Send Thanks

Even if you didn’t get the job, it’s important to thank the people who took the time to talk with you, interview you, and help you get that far in the process. They will respect you for it and appreciate the gesture. Not only that, but sending a brief thank you note after getting rejected from a job will allow you to stand out, and it will help you further your professional relationships within the company.

2. Be UnderstandingMan upset he didn't get the job

Hiring isn’t easy, and rejecting people isn’t a piece of cake either. Let this person know that you understand the decision and thank them for considering you for the role. Who knows, if this person doesn’t work out, they might call you up and bring you in since you’re a “warm lead” for the role. Or, they might have a different opening they feel you might be a better fit for. That’s why it’s important to be thankful, positive, and supportive, even though you didn’t receive the offer. The truth is, you just never know what will happen!

3. Briefly Reinforce WHY You’re So Passionate About Working For This CompanyWoman experiences job rejection

If they know you’re deeply passionate about what they do, they’ll know you’re in it for more than just the money and that, if hired, you have the potential to stay at the company for a while. That’s why it’s important to reinforce why you feel so strongly about working for this particular company. So, share your “connection story” with the company, showcase a shared belief you have with the company, or share a personal experience that taught you the value of what that company does.

4. Seek AdviceMan experiences job rejection

Make it easy for this person to help you by asking the right questions. Remember, they’ve already gotten to know you, they know you want to work there, and they know you’re willing to do whatever it takes to get the opportunity. You’re a “warm lead” at this point, so you want to make it as easy as possible for them to choose you over someone else. Ask questions like...

  • “How can I be a better fit for opportunities like this one?”
  • “What do I need in order to earn opportunities like this one at your company?”

If you can find out what you need to do in order to “check off” all of the boxes, then you’ll make your candidacy more attractive in the event another opportunity opens up.

5. Take Steps To Move The Relationship Forward And Ask How You Can Keep In TouchWoman sends a thank you note to the hiring manager

In order to keep this relationship moving forward, you need to ask for it. Being proactive in this situation is critical. Otherwise, your future with the company might be left up to someone else, which is a risky chance to take. Make sure you ask to stay in touch. For example, you could say something like…

“What’s the best way for me to stay in touch with you? I want to be proactive and stay on your radar for future opportunities. I really want to work for your company but I want to earn my place there.”

They’ll appreciate your proactiveness and your willingness to take ownership of the process—on their terms. It will also give you clear next steps on how you should keep this relationship moving forward.

So, remember: even if you didn’t get the job today, there’s still an opportunity to get the job tomorrow. “No, not today” doesn’t mean “no, not ever.” Leverage the progress you’ve made with this company and keep working your stuff!


Need help finding a job?

Check out our FREE resources page!

Or, join our career growth club today and get access to one-on-one career coaching, resume and cover letter reviews, online tutorials, and unlimited networking opportunities—all in your back pocket!

If you want more FREE career advice, follow us on TikTok!

This article was originally published at an earlier date.

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